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Family Traditions – For Today and
Tomorrow
By
Amanda Bennett
(Copyright 2003 Amanda Bennett)
“Hey Mom, don’t forget that we’re going out for
pizza after this last game of the season – it’s a tradition, remember?” “Dad,
when are you going to get the bales of hay and pumpkins for your autumn
masterpiece? Can I go, too – it’s a tradition, you know!” Tradition – just the
word sometimes sounds old and from past generations, doesn’t it? Yet, it has
been family traditions that helped many a family stay together and strong over
the past years, and probably for generations to come. Traditions are so
important in families – the sense of security and love that is felt when
observing traditions as a family will stay with our children for the rest of
their lives. As homeschooling families, we have a unique opportunity in today’s
society to enjoy a wide variety of traditions for all kinds of events and
observances, and integrate them into our learning lifestyle. These traditions
are woven into the fabric of our family, making it stronger and memorable for
everyone.
As a child, I grew up in a family filled with love, children and plenty of
traditions. My parents worked to build the strength of our family with some
traditions that were simple and yet special. We lived far away from any
relatives, so our traditions had to be based on our immediate family, and what a
blessing those traditions were. My parents didn’t realize that these traditions
would get us through some very tough times, and keep our family close through
thick and thin, over many years and generations yet to come.
Early on Sunday mornings, my dad would drive to Krispy Kreme to get hot
doughnuts for our family while Mom got all of us ready for church. To this day,
when I bite into a warm Krispy Kreme doughnut, I remember Sunday mornings and my
dad’s smile as he came through the door with those warm doughnuts. It was a very
simple tradition that meant so much then and even more now. When we are visiting
my childhood hometown, we still visit the same shop, and share smiles and
memories that cross generations.
When I was a young teenager, our family lost my father to cancer when we were
all from 8 to 15 years old. Yes, it was tragic and it was heart-rending, and we
drifted in and out of being convinced that our happy family life had ended.
However, my mother worked hard to keep us safe and housed and educated, but she
strived even harder through it all to maintain our family traditions, and these
added much-needed cement to our family through some very trying times. We still
belonged to the family, the family was still strong, and these traditions gave
us a sense of security and predictability in a world that had changed very
quickly. Traditions became the ties that we needed as we grew and changed –
while some things never changed.
There are many kinds of traditions -- seasonal traditions, holiday traditions,
weekly traditions, and special occasion traditions. They provide a wonderful
time for coming together as a family. Daily prayers, family reading time in the
evening, Sunday soup and popcorn prepared by Dad, the welcoming of summer with a
water balloon fight, preparing our hearts and home for special holidays, and so
much more.
The variety of traditions is infinite, and I’ve heard of some very unique family
traditions in all of my travels around this great country. But that is one of
the things that makes them special – they are YOUR family’s traditions, unique
to you all.
As we approach this holiday season, I know that there are plenty of traditions
that are observed in American homes. At our house, autumn brings an exciting
collection of family traditions. With the start of autumn, I make sure that we
have chrysanthemums on the front steps. They start off on the front steps, then
we plant them in the ground when they finish blooming. Dad collects several
bales of hay, some corn stalks, and a few pumpkins and gourds to make a fall
decoration by the driveway – Dad’s autumn masterpiece, as the kids call it.
After taking care of the decorating traditions, we move on to those that can be
appreciated around the kitchen table. With the harvest of the apple crop here in
Tennessee, we have warm apple pie and ice cream in the evenings, while gathered
around the table rehashing the latest football upsets, debating which baseball
teams will make it to the World Series, and planning the upcoming holiday
season.
Sometimes traditions can span the miles between family and friends. Years ago,
family members and friends began choosing which NFL teams would win the Sunday
games. We named this process “Football Picks,” the object being to see who could
pick the most winning teams, This tradition now is carried on by email for a
collection of friends and family across the country, and it is a simple and fun
celebration of the season, crossing miles and keeping everyone in touch.
With the advancing cooler weather, we have other traditions here at the Bennett
home. We make quite a production of the first fire in the fireplace, enjoying
the beauty of the fire and using the occasion to thank everyone for their
firewood labors of cutting and splitting the wood for the coming winter. With
the cooler weather, we also begin our autumn weekend sky-watching parties around
large campfires – so that we can watch for stars and planets and satellites, and
enjoy the Milky Way as it spreads out in the dark country sky. Family and
friends come from all over to join us in this endeavor, and while we don’t work
out ALL of the problems of the world, parents, grandparents and children all
benefit from the time spent together.
Here are some ideas
for traditions that your family might enjoy:
With the end of a sports season or a church performance or other special
occasion, have an ice cream sundae party at the local ice cream shop. Sometimes
a tradition like this can be a “floating” tradition – one of recognition for
feats accomplished.
With the
birth of each child – plant a special tree, have a flag flown over the US
Capital building (contact your congressman to do this), hold a special family
celebration to welcome the new family member, and don’t forget to take plenty of
pictures.
With the
marriage of each child or sibling – have a flag flown over the US Capital
building, or plant an evergreen tree to mark the occasion.
When having a holiday get-together or
family reunion, try to find a ceramic plate that can be autographed with a
permanent marker, then have everyone sign the plate and bring out the plate at
future get-togethers for sharing memories and smiles.
One holiday tradition that we have observed for many years is
enjoyed around the kitchen table. In the evenings, we gather and paint those
small plaster village houses to create an interesting holiday village. As the
children have gotten older, we have created villages for their new homes and
homes-away-from homes. The tradition of gathering around the kitchen table to
paint and be creative has brought about some fascinating conversations and
treasured insights into each family member, not to mention the “unique” pieces
of art that have been created!
Early in November, we pull out the
favorite family holiday recipes, and my husband begins the preparations to make
his German family’s recipes, handed down from generation to generation. Many of
these take time to prepare, and some of them have to “age” at various parts of
the process. Yes, the house smells fantastic this time of year, and the kids
have come to appreciate the smells and time with Dad in the kitchen.
What are some fun
traditions for preparing for Thanksgiving?
* Planning the holiday weekend with the whole family in early
November (who shall we invite,
which relatives will be here, what
games shall we all play after dinner?)
* Planning the menu so that everyone gets to choose one of
their favorite foods to be included
* Putting up a blessings tree when the children were younger,
making the tree trunk from brown
paper and each family member adding
colorful construction paper leaves to the tree. Each leaf
has a written item that the family
member is thankful for – a blessing on each leaf.
* Finding ways to bless others – sharing the blessings by
packing Samaritan’s Purse Christmas boxes
for children, taking homemade gift
baskets of goodies to neighbors and those in need.
* Bringing out the special Thanksgiving creations collected
over the years – a model of the
Mayflower, a special Thanksgiving
unit study tablecloth, handmade pilgrims and native
Americans, pinecone turkeys, and a
basket of some of our favorite holiday books.
Christmas traditions are also special
at our house – from the close of the Thanksgiving holiday, we begin our
Christmas traditions. We all plan this special month, inviting friends and
family for this very special celebration, bringing out the favorite Christmas
books, setting up the family crèche collection, making wreaths for the house and
barn by hand, enjoying the observance of Advent with a special wreath, candles
and devotions, and so much more.
Whether for birthdays, seasons, holidays, or other special times, traditions
make up an important part of family life. Traditions will be passed from
generation to generation, perhaps changing a bit as time goes by, but the core
values and family love will carry along with the tradition.
Why are traditions
important?
They help
families come together
They remind
us of times together in the past
They give
children a sense of security and predictability
They help our
values and character span generations
They remind
families that love and continuity go hand in hand
Traditions
can be old and many are new
Traditions
give children something to anticipate, a perspective on time passing by
What are your
favorite traditions?
Ask your children about their favorite traditions
Ask your children about their favorite parts of autumn, Thanksgiving, and
Christmas
Now that I’ve given
you some ideas, perhaps you can begin to reflect on some of your family’s
traditions and possibly create some new ones. Recognize them and get ready to
enjoy this season of fun and fellowship, laughter and celebration, thanksgiving
and blessings. Happy Holidays!
Until next time,
Amanda
Amanda Bennett is a writer, speaker, wife, and mom of three. She and her family
live on their farm in Tennessee. To learn more about Amanda’s books and unit
studies, visit her website at www.unitstudy.com
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